Can you believe she is pregnant?

How many times has this come out of our mouths?  The young, unmarried girl in high school or college, the woman with five or six children already, or the mother who is "too old" to add another baby to her family...  we have all been there and passed judgment on the girl, her family, the entire situation.  While no mother prays for her daughter to be in the situation that Mary was in at the age of 12, 14, or 16... it happened then... and it happens now.  I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason.  I don't believe that any girl loves her baby any less whether she is married or not.  A baby... is a baby... and who doesn't love one?  I believe that Mary felt the same way about Jesus. 

Some things haven't changed over time, and I believe that no matter the humility, the embarrassment, the shame, the rumors... the everything... that when Jesus was born he was loved by his mother.  As I look at the role of Mary in the Nativity Scene, I can't help but think of how she must have felt.  How did she feel when the angel came and told her she would carry a baby?  Was she elated when she felt him move for the first time?  Did she have everything she needed to make sure he would be well taken care of?  I'm sure she felt the same things I felt when I was pregnant.   What mother hasn't felt those things... even with the unplanned element there? 

I think the biggest lesson we can learn from Mary is what Romans 8:28 tells us...
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to this purpose.

Mary wasn't in the ideal situation... she wasn't married... her soon to be husband knew the baby wasn't his... and who would really believe Mary when she told about the angel?  What started out as pain, worry, and even disbelief turned into the most beautiful story in the world.  In fact, His entire life is a story of pain and gain... Mary suffered through what people judged her about... I wonder if they talked about her parents not being good because "they" allowed this to happen?  I wonder if her friends thought "Gosh, I'm glad that is her and not me"?  I wonder if Mary thought "Why in the world did this have to happen to me"? 

I think our human nature is to think only in the moment... and not think to the future.  God makes no mistakes.  I know that God put Mary in this situation to teach you and me a lesson... to have a model lesson to look to in situations for our own lives.  How many of us have found ourselves in situations where we may be just like Mary?  Embarrassed, shamed, humiliated... but as we grow older and stronger in our relationship with Christ, we realize that these are the situations that make us a better person. 

Don't you think Mary should be someone we all look to when we are hurting, or worried, or afraid?  Look at what Mary went through as a young, unmarried, pregnant girl... but don't stop there... her story turned into something great.  She let God have control and make the best of the situation.  If only I could do that... let Him have control over the situations instead of me.  Let Him use me like He used Mary. 

Where are you in your life right now?  Are you struggling with something?  Are you embarrassed?  Are you humiliated by a situation?  Let it go... you can't go back and change what has happened already.  BUT... you can learn from the situation and be like Mary... rely on the Holy Spirit to guide you... lead you... and make the best of the situation you are in... and if by chance you can take the focus off of yourself for just a minute... you may see the beauty in a bad situation is just God's hand at work in your life. 

I can't wait to get to Heaven and ask Mary if she would do it all again... I have no doubt that she will say yes... I feel sure she would go through the bad again to get the GOOD!  As you stare at your Nativity Scene this season... look at Mary... and think of the beautiful blessing that came from what started out looking like a bad situation... I'm betting at least one person who reads this can testify to the fact that Romans 8:28 has been proven true in their own lives just like it was in Mary's. 

Decorations for Christmas!

As I continue discussing the parts of the nativity scene, specifically the stable, I think it's really important to discuss decorations.  Don't get me wrong.... there is nothing I love more than to "dream" of my house looking like a Hallmark Christmas card or Hallmark movie, but I often find myself completely worn out and just throwing things out at the last minute!  I am very guilty of riding around at night and looking in windows to critique Christmas decorations... I love to see what others do!  One of our old neighborhoods had the leg lamp from The Christmas Story, and I have left that at the top of my favorites list since then... of course I would NEVER have that leg lamp, but I do love to see others decorate with it.

And the tree in the picture... it's there as a tease... I found it on the internet.... it looks like something Ben would have brought home to me when he was little and had an axe to chop down trees... he was nice enough to cut down a dogwood one day and I told him the axe was mine from now on!  He wasn't concerned with anything but cutting the tree down... didn't look at the thickness of the leaves... the height of the tree.... the shape of the tree... just knew he wanted a little tree to decorate for his room.

So... what do decorations have to do with the stable?  EVERYTHING.... As we prepare our hearts for this Christmas season, we don't need to be so bogged down about the decorations.  If God wanted us to decorate every inch of our homes and have 14 trees all over the house... don't you think he would have made the manger scene a little more fancy?  I decided a few years ago that I was miserable at Christmas because I thought I needed to have a tree in every room.  I have limited my decorations now to the elves all over the den, a Christmas tree, and a "golf" tree!

Remember to be simple... Everything about Jesus's birth looked simple, but it was oh so wonderful... as you begin to think about decorating.... remember where Jesus was born... it was simple... remember the night of his birth... it was a simple... remember the reason for the season... how many times have we heard it?  Be like Ben... Be like the night Jesus was born... Be simple and don't let yourself be overwhelmed and not leave room for Jesus.  Make sure you leave room for Him... every day... every hour!

Do the Right Thing at Christmas!

Think back to your favorite Christmas... the excitement you had... the gift that made it great... the places you visited... the people who were there....the list goes on and on.... Sometimes Christmas is better because of your expectations being far exceeded.  Sometimes Christmas is the "best one" because you did the right thing!

Let's go back to the stable for a minute... and being stable.  The Christmas season is filled with all kinds of traditions unique to your own family... things that you think are the most wonderful, magical thing in the world may never happen at your neighbor's house.... and you might sneak a peek in their windows and think how crazy they are at what they decide to do!  As soon as one of these traditions or fun things are missed... your Christmas isn't the same and you feel off-balance... or unstable wondering if Christmas is going to be ruined because you didn't get to experience ________ this year.

Let's go really far back and think about the first Christmas... the morning/night that Baby Jesus entered the world... I wonder what Mary thought as she held this miracle baby... I wonder if his birthday each year got any better in her eyes or was the first one the best?  What did she think as she held him and watched him grow?  My gut feeling is that this was the best Christmas ever for her.  She had God in her arms...she knew it was a miracle...and that was all she needed.  Honestly, that's all you and I need every day.... that's it! 

As a mother/woman, we want things to be stable and perfect.  We want things to be planned... perfect... and punctual.  Nothing has changed much from today to back then... I'm sure Mary had wished this had been a planned pregnancy... a perfect birthplace... and any time but during a census!

So where does this lead us today?  It's simple... DO THE RIGHT THING!  Yep... you read that just right.... that's simple, right?  Plan all the activities for the family, buy the best gifts you have ever given, give money to the poor children, and send out those lovely Christmas cards... isn't that the best thing?  Isn't that the right thing to do? Insert "sarcasm" here!

James 1:22

Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.

I have looked and looked in the Bible for the part where it says I have to have a meat and three for Christmas Eve lunch, and then an elegant dinner for Christmas Eve night, a huge buffet breakfast for Christmas morning, and prime rib and potatoes for Christmas night... but I can't find that!  Don't get me wrong... I LOVE to eat... I love to open a present... I love to get Christmas cards (I don't take time to send them anymore).... but none of that is in the Bible....

So as I ponder the stability in my house... am I "doing the right thing"?  Am I spreading God's word to those around me?  Am I opening up my home to someone who may not know about that Christmas morning when Jesus was born... am I helping others...am I doing what God wants me to do OR what I think needs to be done? Am I following the commands that God's word tells us about?

It sounds so easy doesn't it?  Do the right thing and things will be great.  Nope... doing the right thing isn't always the easiest thing to do... but it's the right thing to do.  To be "stable" this year... focus on doing the right thing... do what God's word says and spread the love of Christ... we are here to spread His seeds... and He makes them grow! Gain your stability in reading and knowing what God's word says.... and DO THE RIGHT THING!

What do you need to be stable?

At any moment your life can change... a doctor's visit, a call from a family member, a freak accident, anything... things like this cause me to panic for a brief second... or longer... I've gotten much better, but if I didn't have some tools in my box I would never be able to survive some days.

One of my favorite stories from the Bible is David and Goliath.  I encourage you take a few minutes today and read I Samuel 17.  As you read, write down the story and what happened... I love to do a timeline and see how God's hand was at work with every part of His stories.  Once I started doing that, I realize that He is at work in my life too... and yours!

The part of David and Goliath I want to focus on today is I Samuel 17:49.  There are many fascinating parts to this story... David even being chosen is remarkable to me... but this verse...

Reaching into his bag and taking out a stone, he slung it and struck the Philistine on the forehead. The stone sank into his forehead, and he fell facedown on the ground.

This verse gets me through some situations that I don't think are possible.  

David had a big problem... a HUGE problem... a giant to fight.  What are you fighting today?  It's something... something is bothering you... something is making you anxious... something is making you nervous.  Allow yourself to be in David's shoes (sandals) for a moment.  

"Reaching into his bag".... Where do you go for trouble in your life?  Do you post it on Facebook and ask for advice, do you burden family members with rambling, do you keep it inside and let it eat at you like cancer?  Where do you reach?  

"Taking out a stone"... David knew where he needed to reach for safety... his bag... he also knew that God was on his side... Do you have confidence that God is on your side?  Do you reach in the right places for a weapon?  Do you grab the right things to "fight" with?  

"He slung it and struck the Philistine on the forehead".... When you find yourself in a situation, do you know how to strike back?  Not in a hateful way, but do you know what to do when and what to use to arm yourself with the right weapon?  

And here's my favorite part... "The stone sank into his forehead, and he fell FACEDOWN on the ground".... OH MY!  David knew where to hit this giant... and when you think about it... if you stand in front of someone and hit them in the head... they most likely will fall backwards.... but not this big giant!  He fell facedown.... that problem of David's was done!  FACEDOWN.  

I have a lot of things in my purse... my children think the kitchen sink is in there, but I don't have a stone...or a slingshot... when I reach to fight back at my demons, I reach to the BIBLE.... that's the best place.  Any problem you are having today... or facing in the future... an answer can be found in the Bible.  YES... there's your answer for stability.... use your Bible as your weapon.  Learn some verses to fight back with... google your problem and ask for verses.... it's there!  

This morning I pray that each of you who read this... reach into your Bible and know in your heart that God will take care of your giant.  Ask him, pray to him, and have faith that He can do it!  

Prepare  your "stable" for Him by making a strong foundation in your heart!  Use the Bible as your tool and you can't be destroyed!  

Fresh Coat of Paint...

I love to smell paint, I love to walk into a home that smells fresh and clean, and I love to see lines on the carpet.... I like things to look in order!  I'll be the first to admit that I don't want you in my closets or my "more than one" junk drawer in the my kitchen though.... Those are my hiding places for all the times I'm trying to make the outside look good.... but I can't rest easy because I know those drawers and closets are always there.  Every once in awhile I break down and clean them out, and it feels SO GOOD!  That takes a little time, a little extra effort, and a mood to throw things away.  I have to be willing to part with things!

So what does this have to do with Christmas?  Well... in order for us to be able to have a "stable" foundation, we have to work from the inside out....

Matthew 23:27-28 says, "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites!  You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean.  In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness." 

GUILTY!  I've spent a lot of my life trying to make others happy... trying to make others like me... trying to make others think that life is perfect.  But... what I've come to realize is it isn't.  There is no amount of paint, or money, or work that is going to clean my insides.  Sure, we all want to look like we have it together and are doing life just fine, but in all honesty, God doesn't use those people to make a big difference in someone else's life.  I believe that God wants us to talk about our struggles, our fears, our anxieties with others to show them that they can rely on him.  It's hard to sit across from someone and listen to a discussion about how perfect everything is in their life... part of me immediately thinks about all their faults that I know about... and part of me feels sorry for them because they aren't being truthful.  In my old age... of 47....I've found that there isn't one family who doesn't struggle... there isn't one parent who hasn't been disappointed in their children... there isn't one wife who hasn't wanted to choke her husband at one point or another... there isn't one friend who hasn't been hurt by words of another friend... and there isn't one churchgoer who hasn't been upset at another churchgoer!  I could go on and on about all the things in life that hurt us on the inside... and how we continue to smile and act like things are great on the outside.

In the early years of Facebook, I have Timehop to remind me of this, I think I posted about every hour of my day.... I guess I wanted to share my every thought and what was going on in my life with others... as I look back, I realized that I was posting about what I wanted my life to be like.  As the years have gone by, I have used my blog to post about my real feelings.  I have used my words to show my thoughts... good and bad.... my feelings.... happy and disappointed... my actions... appropriate and inappropriate to show the true me.  I think we all want to appear one way... but if something is bothering us... we need to be honest and open about it.  Unfortunately, some people think Facebook is the place to be honest and open about it.  My view on that has changed.

Find that one person to be honest and open about what is going on in your life.... it is cleansing and renewing... I have several good friends that I can call at the drop of a hat and just have "diarrhea of the mouth"... when I get finished spewing and saying my peace.... it's over.  They listen... they give advice... they disagree with me... they pray for me... whatever the case... I don't advertise on Facebook what it is!

Today- your outside may be as clean and straight as the whitewashed board in the picture above, but what do your insides look like?  Do you have healthy thoughts coming from your mouth... or negative?  Do you have jealousy and anger inside, or are you at peace because you have prayed for those things to go away?  Do you have something you probably need to get out of / off your heart... do you need to tell someone you are sorry for something?  Do you need to confess a sin to someone?

The reality is this... if you don't work on the insides of your life before you paint the outsides... you aren't doing any good at all.  You won't be "stable"... you won't be ready for Jesus to be inside you because you don't have "room in the inn" for him.  In order to be "stable"... you are going to have to make some changes.

Pray that hatred, anger, jealousy, disappointment, anxiety, regret, etc out of your heart.  Ask God daily to remove it... confess what you are feeling... sometimes it helps to find a confidant to confess what's on your heart and her praying with you makes it all better.  Today, pray for your insides... that you will be clean and refreshed... and the secret to all this...your outsides will naturally fall into place when the inside is clean!

What's Your Foundation Built On?

There is nothing I love more than being at the beach.  It's my favorite place... it's where I'd love to live... it's where I hope to retire one day... but I'm already worried about where I will live.  Sure, I'd love to live oceanfront with a big screened-in porch, rocking chairs, huge sofas for relaxing, and possibly a porch swing, but I also know that the weather is not your friend when you have an oceanfront house.  I'd rather be safe than sorry... I have thought a lot about what structure would be best... most affordable... suitable.  I change my mind a lot... but without a doubt, I know that I don't want my house built of sand.  I mean how many sand castles did I build as a child to find them swept away as soon as the tide came!  

Stability is something we all need and want.  Jesus talks about this in Matthew 7:24-29.

The Wise and Foolish Builders

24 “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. 25 The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.26 But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. 27 The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.”

28 When Jesus had finished saying these things, the crowds were amazed at his teaching, 29 because he taught as one who had authority, and not as their teachers of the law.

 From what I've read, I believe that Jesus was most likely born in a cave... a rock possibly hollowed out... so when I read the story of the wise and foolish builders, I can't help but think that because there was no room in the inn... the best place for Jesus to enter this world was on a strong foundation.  I think God chose that place for many reasons... Nothing about the Christmas story is elegant or fancy... neither is where Jesus was born!  We can all agree that a cave would be pretty safe and stable though!  My nativity scene isn't the traditional one made of wood... it looks like rock, stone, or the "Aztec" theme.  When I look at it, I think about what people see when they look at my own house.  The house, the foundation, the structure of my every day life... sand or stone?

The structure I live in is strong, but is the foundation that I'm giving my children and family truly strong.  Am I giving them a "stable" living environment.  Later in the week I'll talk more about that, but today I want to ask a few questions... Do you know the Bible?  Do you know His words?  Are you putting them into practice?  When... not if... storms arise in your life, are you weathering the storm or are you falling apart?  

That last question hits home for me... when Daddy died, I made a BIG decision not to sit in self-pity and make my children miserable and worried about their mama.  I wanted to show them that death is not final, death is not the worst thing in the world, and death wasn't going to define me and make me a horrible person full of anger and hate because Daddy wasn't here anymore.  I wanted them to see that life goes on... and death is a part of life!  We celebrate Easter... the death of Christ... sure those three days were sad in between the death and resurrection, but we wouldn't have the resurrection without the death... we have to have bad sometimes to enjoy the good!  

I've been lucky in my life, I really haven't had many things go terribly wrong considering what some other people have been through in their lives.  I've been hurt by friends, I've been disappointed by decisions my children made, I've been upset about situations at work, I've been attacked personally... the list goes on and on.... but when I look at others who are dealing with health, divorce, deceit, neglect, addiction...  my life really isn't that bad.  Through each of the trials I've been through in my life, I've tried my best to weather the storm.  I always comment at work when things get crazy that "The old redneck Britt would have done this... but the new Britt is going to sit back and settle because I know it's in God's hands"... 

Where are you today?  If a storm comes up in your life, are you going to wash away with the winds and rain... or are you going to stand strong in your faith until the storm stops?  It's YOUR choice.  You get to make that choice EVERY DAY.  Be like the stable that Jesus was born in... be Strong... prepare your home for Christmas this year by being settled on a strong foundation!  It may be a holiday you are dreading... don't dread it though... God's word tells us that we are to put into practice His words.  I can't find anywhere in the Bible that tells me to sit and sulk and be miserable.  I do find verses of hope and comfort during storms and trials in my life though!  

So today... work on the structure of your house!  Figuratively, ask yourself if you are "stable"... if you lean on His word you can be!  Some of you may ask, "How, Britt?  How can I become more stable?"  I don't have all the answers, but I do know that there is no other comfort to me than sitting down with Jesus every morning before I start my day and having a cup of coffee with Him.  I write down my prayer requests, pray for those I love and YES I pray for those who disappoint me and hurt me!  I have some Bible apps on my phone to help guide me through devotionals... and at the suggestion of a friend, I am constantly reading my way through the Bible.  I'm learning so many things daily!   If you can just start with spending time with Him each day... your foundation will become stronger and stronger... and you will have a STABLE life!  Let me know if you have a specific prayer request... I'd love to add you to my list!  

The Stable

The Nativity Scene   

     In an effort to help my focus, over the next few weeks I'd like to spend some time looking at  the nativity scene.  In fact, the nativity scene pictured has become my favorite Christmas decoration.  I'll admit it... it hasn't always been the focus of our house... the tree got up... the presents were under the tree... the wreaths hung on the windows and door... the parties.... the elves... all that..... and I would sometimes turn on my nativity scene... and sometimes not.   This year I'll be looking at this decoration a little differently.
      The Christmas before I got married, I saw this Department 56 Nativity Scene in Gatlinburg, and I begged Mama for it... I thought she'd say no because of cost... but somehow I ended up with it.  Little did I know then I'd love it even more some twenty two years later... it was there our first Christmas... when I wanted to be in Lincolnton... and I was in Greenville all alone until Christmas Eve when Mark got home.  It was there the year that KB was born... and we brought her home from the hospital on Christmas Eve... and it was there last year when I thought it would be a terrible Christmas without Daddy... but it was one of the best ever.   It has been here even when it wasn't really the focus... right up under my nose!
     For the past two years I have had the opportunity to teach a Christmas Bible study at the church.  I have to start earlier in the season preparing... so my heart has gotten into Christmas a little earlier this year again.... that and the fact that all my friends here are thinking I'm crazy that I'm just putting out pilgrims instead of being like them and putting out Christmas trees!
      The next few weeks leading up to Christmas I'll be writing about the characters, the structure, and parts of the Nativity scene.
      I'd like to start with the "stable".  Until recently, I used my childhood perception of the manger being in a barn... like Pa Ingalls had... I didn't know it was most likely a cave or a lower room of someone's residence.  There are many suggestions... just google them... but I do know that whatever Jesus was born in was STABLE... whether it looked like Pa Ingalls's barn, or a cave, or a basement area... it was stable.  I think the play on words there is not irony... it is truly stable.
     Using the word "stable"... I think it's important for me to have a stable foundation of what the true story of Christmas is... where I should focus... I can put up decorations, make homemade gifts, bake cookies for neighbors, and plan the best parties ever, but if I don't have a foundation... a stable home... none of those things will truly bring me joy.  I've been there... I've tried to buy happiness for my children, I've tried to buy happiness for myself... and I've tried to find happiness in friends, or trips, or Hallmark channel activities that make those actors smile... but I really don't need to look anywhere except the stable... where the manger was.
      I recently finished a Bible study where we discussed making our bodies vessels for Christ... is He welcome there... are we creating a healthy vessel... are we using our vessels to do what Christ is asking us to do... I picture the stable as the vessel that Christ was born in... the foundation... and I think about our house... are we doing everything we can to prepare a stable foundation for what life has to offer and bring?  I sure hope so... we aren't perfect, but I believe with all my heart if we focus on the real reason of Christmas we will be just fine.
    As I prepare for this Christmas season, I pray my heart focuses on the stability of a life with the foundation being Jesus Christ... I pray my heart focuses on the parts of the nativity scene and remembers that not one part of the Christmas Story was just added for excitement or enhancement... everything... down to the animals was there for a reason...
     Maybe Christmas is hard for you... maybe you act like you really love it, but you don't... maybe you openly dread every second of it... maybe you need to renew that Christmas spirit and renew a relationship with Jesus that you haven't worked on lately... maybe you need to work on the "stable"... your body, your heart, your mind to welcome Him inside... I hope you will be willing to open up and share with us during this season as we prepare to celebrate his birth.